Ugh. I forgot to get gas yesterday. I'll have to get some after I get groceries. I haven't gotten gas in a couple weeks, so I should have a bunch of FuelPerks saved up.
I hate driving... I REALLY hate driving in winter.
Well, I can't really see if anybody is coming, so um, here goes.
Phew.
Shit. It's Sunday. Why do I always go to the grocery store on Sunday? It's gonna be packed. F**k. It's worse than I expected. Look at this madness! Utter chaos. Sunday at Giant Eagle is always like f**cking amateur hour...
Hah. That's pretty pathetic that I see myself as some sort of superior grocery shopper.
Where are all the baskets?
Oh.
"Can I grab one of these?"
Hmm... that dude seemed kinda... well, slow.
Alright, what do I need again?
OK, all I need from the produce section is a lemon. This one will do.
Oh yeah, I gotta make sure to remember everything that happens so I can write that thing for class.
Please hurry up and make your meat selection and move out of the way! How f**king long does it take to pick out a package of crushed up cow flesh? I hate grocery shopping on Sundays. Hmm... I don't usually buy ground turkey, that's weird they put it with the ground beef instead of with the other poultry. What the f**k? Taco seasoned ground turkey? Are people really so impotent in the kitchen that they can't even season their own meats? Can't I just get some regular f**king ground turkey meat? Well, I guess ground chicken will work.
Geez, lots of people are buying beer.
Why is the section of cheap, shitty wines called "California Popular Wine"? With whom are Carlos Rossi and Franzia popular with? Winos? Hah. Well, I guess I am not much better considering my wine selection process consists of not much more than a brief consideration of price and alcohol content. Hah. I guess I probably would be doing my wine shopping in the "California Popular Wine" section if I wasn't planning on cooking with some of it.
OK, what next?
Pasta.
Caa-vaa-taa-pi
Hah. Everything I know about Italian accents I learned from Giada de Laurentiis and "The Sopranos".
Alright, here we go... Giant Eagle brand? Good enough.
Aghhh... so many people in here... I hate having to awkwardly squeeze past people in the aisles.
Hmm... I should write thing for class as some sort of stream-of-consciousness type thing. Writing a straight list of 50 things sounds pretty borin- Shit.
I should've gotten the canned tomatoes while I was in the pasta aisle. Ah, well I'll just get them on my way back.
OK... eggs.
Hmm... looks like eggs were popular today.
Cracked one in here.
These look fine.
OK, OJ.
High pulp? that sounds pretty good, I like pulp.
Huh, I do most of my shopping on the outskirts of the store. Fresh vegetables, bakery, fresh meat and seafood, dairy. Hmm... I bet those areas are on the outskirts because they are closer to where they are delivered and prepped for display. And food with a longer shelf life are in the aisles. Ehhh... food shouldn't come in a cardboard box... wrapped up and packaged like a f**king action figure or something.
Hah.
Interesting contrast. Outskirts of Giant Eagle: fresh vegetables, bakery, fresh meat/seafood, dairy, and....... feminine hygiene products.
Where the f**k is the Pert Plus? It's green, it should stick out.
Wow, shampoo containers are really colorful.
Ah.. here we go.
Huh, I wonder if people that give a shit about washing their hair would look down on me for using Pert Plus the same way I look down on people that eat bullshit super-processed foods...
Whatever, f**k 'em...
Ok, shaving cream...
Ehh... considering that I shave once a week, and have been using my roommate's shaving cream for the past two months, I'll just go for the cheap stuff... Barbasol? Sounds great.
Alright, just need some tomatoes and I can get out of here.
Ah... I forgot to check how much kale I have left... I hope it's enough. I've never really had kale before, but it tasted good enough in that soup yesterday. Turkey and kale meatballs sounds kinda weird, but I'm sure it will be good. Well, I guess they'll be chicken and kale meatballs now.
Alright, canned whole tomatoes, Umm... I don't think I have any left, so I should probably get two cans.
Ahhhhhhh... these lines are ridiculous.
Well, I guess this one looks the shortest.
Ughhh... their cart is jam packed with groceries... I'm gonna be here all night,
AGGGHHHH... the worst part about user-operated checkout systems is that half the users are completely incompetent... You should have to pass a test before being able to access the self-checkout lanes...
Gah... the Super Bowl is tonight? That explains the madness.
Hah... Sausages, cheese, and sour cream? Looks like the Coke cooler has become the receptacle for the indecisive shopper.
Ahh.. good, looks like these people actually know what they are doing...
Geez, it's later than I thought... I really don't want to wake up at 6:15 tomorrow.
I really hate that I have nothing to look at besides these stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid celebrity "news" magazines. Are there really people that actually care what is going on with anyone from "Teen Mom"?
Alright... they're done bagging.
Ah, can't forget to scan my Giant Eagle card...
*beep*
*beep*
*beep*
*beep*
*beep*
I'm really glad I don't work in a grocery store anymore, and I don't have to listen to this chaotic orchestra of electronic beeps and bloops for hours on end...
Alright... it was less than I thought it would be...
Hmm... I'm not really sure but it really looks like this guy is staring at me type my PIN in...
OK, I can definitely fit all this into two bags...
Aghh.. I just wanna get outta here...
Alright...
Finally.
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